DAIRING ALL OVER THE PLACE
“I only have 30 seconds left of being a good friend.” You know, we can easily help Serena with her lack-of-hook-up time: Blair and Dan could just consolidate in Blair’s bed.
I love how Nate is now a completely unabashed whore. First Blair, now Chuck. Nate, let’s get you some dignity. I’m sure they must make it in your size. I mean, look at how nicely it’s been fitting on Dan lately, and he doesn’t even have your golden complexion.
HAHA CHUCK GOT SLAPPED. Lily, you’re my hero. Although how crazy fake was that fight?
Aw, Serena almost shows a semblance of being a good big sister.
Also, how obvious that Dan’s morning meeting was with Blair? ASKING HER TO LUNCH!!!! “I’ll help you if you admit that you need me.” You know what they say: it’s better to be needed than wanted. :)
Ugh, Serena is such a cockblock. But obviously they’re totally hinting that Blair and Dan would be totally hot sneaking around.
“You know who gets really, really good weed? Chuck.” See? Nate is such a BAD WHORE. STOP HIRING HIM. LET HIM TRY ON DIGNITY. He shouldn’t be limited by his undeniable sexy man-bang-ness.
DAN HUMPHREY, ALMOST DRUG MULE. J’ADORE. Vanessa? Not so much.
Stroop test, bitches! Psych what up!
Serena’s plans are the worst. “Let’s unwrap presents until we find your trust fund!”
“You know who loves ice cream? Chuck.” WORST WHORE EVER.
Rufus is such a bad actor. I LOVE HIM AND HIS DORKY FINGER GUN.
Blah blah Serena/Ben blah blah.
I like that $100,000 is the “shockingly crazy” amount. I bet in the writing room, they were like, “50,000? Naw, that’s Rufus’ weekly allowance from Lily as her kept man.” Couldn’t Eric just pay Damien in sex? $100,000 worth of sex would be like half a season of Kevin Zegers shirtless, right?
DAN TOTALLY TRIED TO SAVE BLAIR’S ASS. God, how is it possible that they’re so beautiful together?
Blah blah Ben is actually just as crazy as we all knew he was blah blah blah. Attempt to make Vanessa part of the plot by giving her just not enough information to screw things up again. Can we buy dignity in bulk?
Nate/Chuck love triangle means pretty much nothing when you barely care about the girl and they haven’t acted like besties since season two.
HOMG, Bass/Van der Woodsen/Humphrey cake time. I LOVE IT.
I love Blair’s smile when she opens up to Dan. SO BEAUTIFUL.
It was so obvious by Serena mentioning that Dan and Blair were cockblocking her and Ben that Dan and Blair would have to have their own little shenanigans.
The Philadelphia Story! God, such a good movie. I know that by them actually referencing the movie that they’re acknowledging that Dan and Blair will not actually get together, but this at least guarantees a kiss, right?
OMG BLAIR SLEEPING ON DAN’S SHOULDER! HOMG PROMO! “JUST ONE KISS”!!! GET OUT CHUCK AND STAY IN YOUR STUPID LOVE TRIANGLE WITH NATE! (I don’t care about Nate’s dignity when DAIR is on the line!)
WHY ISN’T IT NEXT WEEK YET?!?!?!
